Delicate

Next Saturday I leave for Arizona, and I haven't quite decided how I feel about it yet.

I'm going to visit someone who I've only seen once, very briefly, in the last three years because of a...disagreement. I guess that's the best word to describe it. I love this person very much, but she always tests the limits of my patience in every area.

I was originally staying less than a week, but now it's nine days. My dad tried to tell me that maybe it's not the best idea; once I'm there, I'm stuck. But, because I feel peace about it, I'm going in trusting God that He will be with me and guide my words and actions so that, at least for my part, I can know I tried my best.

Maybe it appears that I'm only going into this with a bad attitude, but that's not actually the case at all. I'm very excited, just scared that... well, to tell the truth, I have no idea what I'm so scared of. Myself, possibly? Every time I go somewhere new, I wonder if my self will grow or struggle as a result.

My highest hopes are that this will be an opportunity to lay aside all stress and just relax to my fullest potential. My body is still in go-mode, and I'd really like to lay back and enjoy the break while I have it. And I want to mend this broken relationship. There are past hurts that need to be addressed, and I would really like to have all of that taken care of when I get back.

So, here goes. I'm setting out on an adventure with no clue as to how it will turn out.

Am I scared? Yes. Terrified? Pretty much. Going anyway? Absolutely.