Sometimes These Thoughts Are More than Thoughts

You know when you say just the wrong thing at the wrong moment with the best intentions but those intentions are thwarted by a lack of saving grace (i.e. either right moment or right thing to save the one that was wrong) because, despite those best intentions, it is really not a wrong moment or a wrong thing but a wrong person to say it to?

You know when there is that perfect line in your head that will get the desired reaction if said with just such and such an intonation and enunciation and explanation and exclamation, and in your mind there is no fault in it except a delirious desire to be understood and a lack of fear that it could fail because how could it fail and oh gosh what if it fails because that never crossed your mind and then it does because no one line can save everything and because people are unpredictable and they fail too?

You know when you plan the future and it stretches out like a forever expanding and contracting roadmap of months and weather patterns and anticipated events and life seasons that looks like it is without a hitch so you begin to imagine hitches and fallout and easy fixes and really hard fixes, so you wait for the hitches and the hitches never come and with their lack of arrival comes a lack of need for all expected fixes, easy and really hard, and life plays out exactly the way the roadmap said it would and it's confusing and almost frustrating because life has taught that plans never go off without a hitch but here they are and suddenly fear can suck it?

You know when you think so deep and complicated that it hurts?

Yeah, that's right now.