It's a Command, not a Request

It's amazing to me how these things work. Is it my subconscious or my spirit this time, or even the Spirit? I think of a random phrase to put into Google Images hoping for the perfect picture to describe my blog in order to kick off a thought process that can pinpoint exactly where I'm at right now. "Follow me." Oh...okay. And Scripture appears. All at once I realize that this is where it had to head all along.

My plans for the summer are changing. My plans for the life I wanted are changing. Notice the pattern? When it's mine (or I think I have some say), it has no choice but to conform to God's will eventually.

I don't know if it has come across in my latest blogs, but I've been "avoiding" God lately. He's hurt me and I'm the sulky, hold-back-when-hurt type. Despite my hardness, He pursues. I'm finally getting back to a place where I want to want Him again. I even decided to start reading my Bible again...and then I left it in Calgary. A sign? Or my subconscious sabotaging me?

At a Bible study recently, we discussed how Jesus said "follow Me" and expected that the following entailed leaving everything else of import behind. Every day He asks me the same thing. Every day I shake in my proverbial boots hoping it won't come up. Every day I'm faced with it. And unfortunately, every day I walk away with the attitude of a sad, but still "rich", young man.

This summer is about to shake me at my foundation. Amazing that I can ignore God, or at least try, and He still guides with my best in mind.

I love you, Daddy.