Wreck

I am an emotional wreck, and I have no idea why. Normally I would chalk it up to something monthly and forget about it, but this has laid a hold of me and has transformed me into this mess who I, unfortunately, recognize.

Back in the tenth grade, I struggled with depression after the death of a family member, to the point where I could not function at a normal level. I cried at least once a day, often for no reason at all, and would be so uncontrollably emotional that people didn't want to be around me. Either that, or I would avoid people altogether so as to not bring about the tears.

I am not crazy to this extent - yet - but I feel myself on the verge of losing control. It takes all my focused effort to not cry when the simplest thing happens. The littlest things get blown out of proportion in my head and the tears are immediate.

Why am I blogging about this? I have no idea. I just started typing and here it is. Maybe this is just me being scared, and hoping that somehow, by this emotional vomit, I will be able to lay out the mess in my head and sort it into a pattern of thought that follows logic, twisted or not.